🧠The Stress of Being Stressed
Please send help, kthxbye.
No matter what role you play in T&S, being in the trenches is not optional. In the beginning, it's painful and awkward, and you have to quickly learn how to dissociate yourself from what you're seeing. Because my mind works differently (see: odd duck), this isn't a huge problem for me, but I've seen many people struggle with it.
It's inevitable that you'll need to turn off your empathy meter at some point. Along the way, you learn little tips and tricks to do so, like how old wives tales spread across early civilizations:
Never look at the face, especially the eyes
Play the video without sound
Play the video backwards, if at all possible
Look at the corner of the material and then slowly move your eyes across the screen
etcetera.
One of my passions is wellness and wellbeing in T&S, specifically in Ops where most content exposure occurs. In fact, I researched the topic tirelessly before I left Google and I created a proposal for how moderator wellness should be built at Roblox, starting from scratch. I've read the data, analyzed the opinions, but still people who have never seen content before present me with the same solutions. It's like the witch sketch from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, which - if you haven't seen this movie - stop what you're doing and go watch it immediately.
Product: We have found a solution, may we make product adjustments?
Me: Interesting, what is it?
Product: Make the content black and white!
Me: But how do you know this will help and not distract?
Product: .... because we do!
Moderators: We said no, this wouldn't help.
Me: Well?
Product: Well, we did ask. But we have sources and data!
Me: What sources? Only one study I've seen found that switching an image to black and white marginally helped people process terrorist content with less stress. The study, however, was very limited, and overall measured stress didn't decrease significantly.
Product: ... but they got... a little better.
I get stressed over being stressed, and that's heightened during these types of interactions. I ask myself: Do I push back unnecessarily? Am I crazy? Why don't they listen to me? Can't they see that my team suffers from stress and burnout, and making pictures black and white doesn't solve the problem? Trying to balance interpersonal working relationships while mulling over these questions is exhausting. It's enough to drive anyone crazy.
In case you feel the same way, let me share some practical tips and tricks for reducing T&S stress. Hopefully this will give you the space to deal with normal corporate politics.
(Caveat: These work for me, but may not work for you. If you are in an emergency situation, please seek professional help.)
Play Tetris after reviewing content: Studies have shown that playing Tetris after witnessing a traumatic incident can lessen the likelihood of developing PTSD. The nature of our jobs often leaves content moderators with vicarious or secondary trauma (I'll post about that soon! ), so playing Tetris on break or after shifts can help ease the mental burden. Plus, it's a classic and it's fun.
In-the-Moment Affirmations: Not the corny kind you say in a mirror. Close your eyes, relax your forehead, and repeat to yourself: I am not crazy. My feelings are common. I am safe. These feelings will not last. After repeating this a few times, get up and grab some water until you feel ready to return to your computer.
Fidget/Distraction Tools: Those corporate-branded fads of a few years ago actually work. This is what is known as "rapid stress management" or "orienting," where you bring yourself out of the ether and into your body. Look, I don't like frou-frou sounding things or gimmicks, but studies show these tools are beneficial - and who doesn't like playing with Legos, spinning a disc, or wrapping a pipe cleaner around their finger? Alternatively, coloring books can be used. A colleague of mine kept a coloring book and pencils on her desk. Every hour, she would spend 5-10 minutes coloring, finding it incredibly therapeutic.
Quick-er-cise: AKA quick exercises. You can stretch at your desk, do a quick lap around your house or office, or bounce up and down in your chair. Long-form exercise can also be beneficial when done after work, such as trauma-informed yoga or running. I personally found boxing helpful.
And finally - drum roll please - Go see a therapist: It's not the jazziest suggestion (and it's not quick), but I really suggest seeing a therapist and maybe a psychiatrist. You are not weak or incapable of handling your job because of it. There are times when you just need to get it out and process your emotions with someone who can help. Beta blockers may also be helpful. In the aftermath of a particularly gruesome day, my psychiatrist prescribed a short-term regimen of beta blockers, which helped me tremendously. Since I'm not a doctor, I can't tell you whether medication is the right thing for you, but don't be afraid to explore all of your options. In retrospect, I regret not seeing a psychiatrist and a therapist sooner.
Dealing with content is tough. Dealing with people who don't get it is tough. I firmly believe that we are all "digital first responders" because we are effectively traumatizing ourselves so that people can connect in wonderful, interesting ways on the internet without fear of stumbling upon the chaos of freedom of expression. This is hard, unforgiving work, and not everyone will get that. So be kind to yourself, and if you need a friend, I'm always here at hellofriend@internetisawful.com
P.S. - I'm not hating on product teams, I absolutely adore every product team I've ever worked with. And hey, maybe black and white toggles do work, maybe I just haven't seen the right population of people to test it on. I am skeptical, not unreasonable. But, my product people, if you want to help us out, create consistent tooling for removals and reporting. Ops often manages upwards of 10 (!) tools to do their job, and that 100% leads to burnout and frustration. Fixing that would be * chef's kiss * 👌